Visitors and newcomers sometimes remark that Catholics don’t seem very friendly in church compared to their experience in non-Catholic churches. Although this experience differs from parish to parish, there are a number of factors which may contribute to this impression:
• In the past Catholics were taught to be prayerful and silent in church, out of respect for the presence of the Blessed Sacrament in the tabernacle. This attitude endures among many Catholics, even in churches where the tabernacle has been relocated to a side chapel.
• Since Catholics have an obligation to attend Mass regularly, the presence of anyone, whether familiar or not, is not especially remarkable and does not elicit the kind of recognition or appreciation which may be natural in churches where attendance is more or less voluntary.
• The fact that many Catholic congregations are much larger than many non-Catholic congregations, and parishes offer a variety of weekend Masses on Saturday evening or Sunday morning means that the presence of people in church who are not familiar is quite common at any given weekend Mass.
• In addition, unlike many non-Catholic churches, older Catholic churches do not have an adequate lobby or gathering space adjacent to the church proper where members can meet one another and welcome newcomers before or after Mass.
On any given Sunday, any one or a combination of these factors may contribute to the impression that Catholics in a particular parish are not very friendly or welcoming.
If you are a newcomer or visitor, introduce yourself to the hospitality ministers who greet you at the door and inform them that you are new or visiting. If you plan to attend a particular parish regularly, you might also ask the parish staff if a regular member of the parish could accompany you to Mass and introduce you to other parish members. Over time, the best way to feel more welcome is to join in fellowship opportunities when they are offered after Mass and to become involved in other parish activities outside of Mass.
Related FAQ
• How to Be More Involved in Your Parish
• How to Choose a Parish
Posted 04.24.23